Everything You Need to Know About Creating a Wedding Guest List

By Caitlin Hoare

Wedding Planning Tips and AdviceTips

Creating your wedding guest list can be a daunting task, filled with potential dilemmas and tough decisions. But fear not, as we are here to guide you through the process and help you navigate through the complexities of deciding who will be part of your special day.

Your wedding guest list can be one of the most challenging parts of planning a wedding. From restricted wedding venue capacity to plus ones and whether to invite parents plus their kids to your wedding day. Not to mention the potential differences in opinion between you and your family members or close friends. However, with our expert insight, we will help you avoid the wedding guest list dilemma. Our step-by-step guide to helping you plan your potential attendees will aid an all-or-nothing approach and help you organise your wedding party. At the start of guest list planning, you may feel obliged to invite certain friends or family members because of others' input; however, you must remember this is your special day, so don’t spend too much time overthinking. Read our ultimate guide instead! This stress-free guide should help put those worries aside and help you focus on how to create the perfect wedding guest list and those all-important wedding invitations.

Who is on your A list and your B list?

It may sound simple but the best place to start is to write down everyone you and your partner would even consider inviting to your special day. Maybe start with your close friends, your immediate family members, their children, and future in-laws. These would be your A list, right? Moving onto your B list, this could include extended family and other potential wedding guests such as co-workers and old school friends. Remember, this is only the first draft so you can start trimming down later. Taking the time to write down everyone you can possibly think of at this point will ultimately save you time when discussing with close family and friends who they might consider too.

Another good place to start when creating your ideal wedding guest list is to have your list and all related information in one central location. This will make the process of creating your seating chart much easier once the time comes. While a simple list or wedding guest list spreadsheet in Excel or Google Sheets would work, with Say I do, you can benefit from a whole host of our guest list features, such as our Guest List and RSVP Manager, Guests Address Collection, and Seating Planner. Who said wedding planning was tough?!

Always remember to go with your gut, though. Do you want a small, intimate wedding? Great—you should feel empowered to make the tough decision and limit your small wedding guest list so you can spend time with those closest to you. Or if a big celebration is more your thing, then a large wedding guest list might be a little more straightforward because you won’t be restricted to tight numbers!

How many guests can you afford?

Depending on the size of both your budget and your wedding venue, you may have to reduce or even allow yourself to increase the guest list. During the wedding planning process, you may have already discussed whether you’re going for the no-expense-spared big day or a more intimate affair. Having a good grasp of your budget ASAP will help, as this will also dictate how many guests can be invited. Remember, the more guests you have, the more expensive your wedding day will be in regard to catering, drinks, decor, and space! Once you have a better idea of your finances, you can make an informed decision based on who is on your ultimate A list and, therefore, must stay on the invite list and who can come to just the reception or simply not be on the guest list at all. It’s unlikely you’ll be able to invite all the people, so once you’ve worked out your priorities, it will be time to do the all-important wedding guest count to see if this is affordable and how many guests you could end up sending a wedding invitation to. Exciting times!

Speak to your wedding guests

Not all of them, obviously! But maybe your immediate family and your list of friends. Depending on what your final guest list looks like and what kind of wedding you are planning for, before sending invitations, maybe consider what close friends and family members suggest regarding plus ones and parents with children. If you have decided to have a kid-free wedding (or a kid-free night), it may be worth drafting a sensitive sentence or two directed to the wedding adults on the invitations explaining your decision. To break the news gently and avoid any hurt feelings, you may like to say something along the lines of, ‘Sadly, our wedding budget wouldn’t stretch to a bigger guest list’ or, ‘We are only inviting our closest friends and family’.

Think about guests’ feelings

Weddings are a beautiful celebration and a pivotal moment in a lot of people’s lives, but sometimes attending a wedding can be hard for single people when they have to attend alone. Considering this, if your wedding budget and your seating plan allow, why not include plus ones? A good rule to consider when wedding planning could be for single people to be allowed a plus one whilst others would be strictly invitation only. This saves you money and space whilst safe in the knowledge that everyone can happily party the night away with their favourite people by their side!

It’s your big day, so enjoy the wedding guest list process

Sometimes, when creating the wedding guest list, couples might end up feeling a little guilty about those they couldn’t manage to include on the (already tight) guest list. The final (and most important) piece of advice we can impart is to remember that this is your special day. Yes, you might have to make a tough decision here and there but try not to let the stress of having the perfect guest list get in the way of this wonderful celebration. So, even if your grandparents want you to invite those distant relatives that you have never met, if you don’t want to, don’t do it. Enjoy the process, and try to stick to your guns!