How Big Should My Wedding Party Be?

So you’re newly engaged (congrats!) and getting stuck into the wedding planning process - it’s only natural for your thoughts to turn to how big your wedding party should be and how to decide who makes the grade! As you contemplate who will stand by your side on your special day, consider the roles, responsibilities and traditions that come with inviting your nearest and dearest to join you in celebrating your love and commitment.

Curating your guest list is one thing, but choosing your VIPs can seem like an overwhelming task - how on earth do you decide who makes the cut?! We're gonna make it easy for you - put simply, we're very much in the ‘Your wedding, your rules’ camp: You want your dog to walk you down the aisle? Adorable! You're having 10 bridesmaids? Ok, great! Your sister is going to be your best ‘man’? We love that for you!

Whilst there genuinely is no right or wrong answer to ‘How big should my wedding party be?’, there are a few things you might like to consider when selecting which roles to fill and who to fill them with.

What is a wedding party?

Before we get started, let’s get clear on what a wedding party is! It is a little confusing, we agree. Your wedding party traditionally comprises you (the wedding couple), the Maid/Man of Honour, the Best Man/Person, bridesmaids, groomsmen, flower girls, page boys and the parents of the wedding couple.

Some couples may choose to stick to the traditional format listed above, filling each role because they want to or think they should. Other couples may choose not to have a wedding party at all, and that is a decision that is entirely up to you!

What's the average wedding party size?

The size of your wedding party will ultimately be determined by how many bridesmaids and groomsmen you choose. It’s the people in these positions that will end up bumping up your final number. You might want to aim for an even number on each side, which always looks pretty great when it comes to the photographs! Or you and your partner might have differing numbers when deciding who you want by your side. Whilst we wouldn’t recommend challenging the world record for the number of bridesmaids (this currently sits at 168!), the average is between 3-5. Of course, the last thing you want to do is upset or insult anyone, so consider carefully who you would like to invite to be your bridesmaid/groomsman because it’s really hard to take it away once it’s been offered and accepted.

Although not as popular as they once were, flower girls and page boys could still be a part of your big day and are a nice way to include younger members of your family or friendship group. Traditionally, they would walk down the aisle first before the bridesmaids - let’s be honest, a small person leading the way is pretty darn cute! Again, this might not be a role you want to include in your big day, but if you choose to, they will be a delightful addition to your wedding party.

Think about your budget

Having a large wedding party sounds epic on paper, but don't forget to do the maths! Traditionally, you'd be footing the bill for their outfits, flowers, hair and makeup, not to mention gifts to thank them for being a part of your big day - all of this can really add up! Before you get excited and invite 20 of your close friends to be in your bridal party, make sure your funds can stretch to this - you don't want to have to cull any of your friends down the line!

It's worth noting that in some countries, it's normal for bridesmaids to pay for their own dress, hair and makeup, which can ease the financial pressure of large bridal parties - countries like the US and Canada have a longstanding tradition of this, but this trend has yet to take off in the UK or Australia.

But I want a small wedding!

There are no hard and fast rules when it comes to the size of your wedding party, but ideally, the bridal party size will be proportionate to the size of your wedding. If you're having an elopement or micro wedding and only inviting three people, then, of course, essentially, they're your wedding party. Still, if you're inviting 50-75 people, then a wedding party of 10 people total can be appropriate if that's what you want - the main thing is that it feels right to you!

Another option that has been gaining popularity in recent years is to ditch the wedding party altogether. Ditching the bridesmaids and groomsmen means you'll have fewer logistics to consider, and you'll have more time together as a couple on your special day. This is a great choice if you have complicated friendships or family dynamics or just want to simplify things so that you can focus on each other. Whatever the reason, having no wedding party is a valid choice that more and more couples are making.

Giving your loved ones specific roles is considered a wonderful and meaningful gesture. After all, these people are your A-list, your best friends, and your closest family members, and it's lovely to be able to honour them in this way, but don't forget these roles come with added responsibilities! We're all too familiar with the embarrassing best man speech and the commentary of the adoring father of the bride, which can both be incredibly heartfelt and entertaining on a wedding day. Don’t forget that, ultimately, the people you choose for these leading roles are there to support you in the lead-up and on one of your biggest life events, so when it comes to choosing your VIPs, it pays to go with your gut.